


Star Wars: The End of the Order

by JoBelle



Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: F/M, Flashbacks
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-08
Updated: 2019-04-12
Packaged: 2019-05-04 02:37:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 13,418
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14583090
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JoBelle/pseuds/JoBelle
Summary: Tales of the battle of Crait have reached every end of the galaxy. The Resistance has grown and a new spark of hope has ignited. The First Order, now led by Kylo Ren, will stop at nothing to crush the rebels. Fates will intertwine and destinies will be realized.





	1. The Funeral

**Author's Note:**

> This all started with a sleepless night and a need for more Kylo Ren/Rey interaction. But then I got to thinking: where does their relationship go from The Last Jedi? How does their closeness affect everyone they know? What are we going to do in Star Wars IX? So... I wrote it. 
> 
> This work will be multiple chapters and is a WIP. I'm not sure what my posting schedule will be but I do have an outline of the entire story and know exactly how I want it all to unfold. I hope you all enjoy it. Thank you for reading. <3

**_Prologue_ **

_ “Ben, get dressed and come out here.”  _

_ Ben turned and squinted against the early morning light that streamed through the opening flap of his hut. It was so bright his uncle was just a shadow against a white backdrop.  _

_ “What time is it?” the young boy asked. _

_ “Time to get dressed,” Luke replied as he walked away.  _

_ The hut fell into darkness again as Ben rolled onto his side and drowsily got to his feet. Whatever it was, it was too early. _

_ Ben knew by looking at the girl that she was half starved. So small and frail, but  her sunburned face covered in a smattering of freckles. She clung to Luke’s leg and buried her face in the fabric of his robes the moment Ben crouched to look at her.  _

_ “Meet our newest youngling.” _

_ The boy looked up inquisitively at his uncle. Uncle Luke always seemed to have some new stray he had just picked up. He wondered how he came by this one. The youngling started to peak around at him. This time when their eyes met she didn’t hide. Instead she squinted, like she was trying to figure him out. Ben felt the corner of his mouth twitch, giving away a slight smile. _

_ “She comes to us all the way from Jakku. Rey, this is Ben Solo.” _

* * *

 

_ He lost his temper again. Despite everything Uncle Luke said and all the Jedi teachings he read, he still couldn’t get a handle on his anger. Ben pressed his head against the garden wall, the stone cold against his forehead. Snoke said anger was necessary; it was the only way to achieve the true power of the Force.  _

_ “Abilities like yours are wasted here. Skywalker is afraid of your power, he will never allow you to become who you’re truly meant to be. If you want to be great…” _

_ If he wanted to be great like his grandfather before him- _

_ The snap of a twig. _

_ Ben spun around, hand falling to the lightsaber hanging from his belt.  _

_ Rey stood staring at him. It had been a few months since Luke had brought her to the Temple. She glanced at his hand hovering above his lightsaber and tilted her head to one side. Not afraid. There was a glint in her eye. Like she almost dared him. _

_ “Get out of here,” Ben spat. _

_ Rey shrugged. “Why?” _

_ He was almost impressed.  _

_ “You have a lot of attitude for someone so small.” _

_ She gave him a grin. “I know.” _

* * *

**The Funeral**

 

_ The general has died _ . That was all the signal said. It was really all the signal could say. How could anyone truly articulate what the loss of General Leia Organa meant to the Resistance, let alone the entire galaxy? And yet Rey was about to do just that.

She took in a deep breath as Lt. Connix pinned the last bit of her hair up and away from her face.

“Thank you,” Rey said softly.

Connix gave a weak smile that didn’t reach her eyes as she left the room. Rey’s chest tightened and she felt the lump rising in her throat. She closed her eyes as she swallowed it down. She would get her turn to cry, she thought.  _ Just not yet. _

“We’re ready for you.”

Finn stood in the doorway. His face was stern, but Rey could tell by the way his shoulders hung that he, like all of them, was grief stricken.

A single tear suddenly rolled down Rey’s cheek, surprising her. She let out a small, gasp and Finn was across the room, kneeling in front of her before she had a chance to wipe it away. He took her hands in his.

“You don’t have to do this,” he said. “This is hard for all of us, everyone will understand. Poe could address them in your place.”

“No.” She shook her head and gave his knuckles a quick kiss. “No, I need to do this.”

Finn nodded and pressed his forehead to hers before helping her to her feet. Rey smoothed out her skirts and followed him down the hallway.

 

The crowd was overwhelming. They hadn’t been at their new base in the outer rim very long, so Rey hadn’t had a chance to meet all of the new recruits. But there were even more unfamiliar faces than just the rebels; distant travelers come to say goodbye to their general, their princess.

She turned, facing Finn. Without her having to ask, he gave her one final look over. The black dress was simple, long-sleeved. It was made out of fabric much softer than anything she had worn on Jakku, but just coarse enough that she didn’t feel completely foolish. It was elegant, but dignified.  _ Or it would be if Leia was wearing it _ , she thought. Finn adjusted her collar and smoothed out the fabric on her shoulders. 

“There you go.”

Rey gave his hand a loving squeeze before climbing the steps of the platform. Finn headed into the crowd, joining Poe and Rose at its center. The three of them huddled in an embrace, Poe quickly wiping his tears on his sleeve. 

“Ladies and gentleman,” Rey began. “Rebels, friends, and loved ones. I stand here before you with a heavy heart. I’m only saying what we all already know when I say General Organa… Leia, was the best of us. A steadfast leader, a wise mentor, and a beacon of hope; her absence will be felt in every corner of the galaxy.”

She paused as she surveyed the crowd. Chewie was standing in front with the droids, one hand on Threepio’s metal shoulder, the other resting on R2’s head. Rey couldn’t imagine how painful this must be for him. His dearest friends were gone, all of them.

“She would not want us to be overcome by our sorrows,” she continued. “She would want us to remember the Light and to remember love.”

Rey’s voice suddenly caught in her throat. She felt it: the tingle on the back of her neck, the ringing in her ears. Her heart began to pound, it was like all the air had gone out of the room. She looked over the crowd once more and there he was, in the very back half-covered in shadow. No one else took note of him but there he stood, as clear as day.  The tears she had been holding back were threatening to come forward.

Rey let out a slow breath, her eyes never leaving Kylo Ren. 

“She loved you… with all her heart.”

Her vision blurred as the tears welled up and streamed down her face. She closed her eyes, but kept her head up.

“She will forever be with us. Her name is embroidered on our hearts and we will all be the better for it.”

Rey opened her eyes. Kylo Ren was gone. All that remained were the sorrowful faces of her friends.

“May the Force be with you, always. Thank you.”

She quickly made her way down the platform steps and into the crowd. Finn hurried over to meet her, Poe following behind him.

“Rey,” Finn called out as he reached for her. She brushed her fingertips against his as she passed, her other hand over her mouth to hold back the sobs. Poe clasped Finn’s shoulder.

“Give her some time. She needs it.”

 

The hallway leading to her quarters was empty, but she could still feel him there. She stood perfectly still, barely breathing.

“Ben,” she whispered. 

Nothing.

With a sigh, she made her way to her room and opened the door. She knew he was on the other side of it before it had slid all the way open. Ben Solo stood against the wall opposite her, looking so small despite his broad frame. In place of his usual black cloak and leather gloves, he wore a simple black tunic and his hands were bare. His hair had fallen into his eyes, but his scar was still visible. It ran down his face and neck like a single, jagged bolt of lightning.

Neither of them moved for what seemed like an eternity. The air in the room felt unbearably heavy. Rey opened her mouth to speak but stopped short as he finally lifted his gaze to hers. The look in his eyes wounded her deeply. It was the look of child whose heart was breaking.

“I’m sorry,” he said.

Rey was taken aback. “What?”

“I have no right to be here. I don’t expect you to… my mother…” His voice trailed off.

“Ben.”

He winced when she said his name. Rey stepped further into the room, the door closing behind her.

“Don’t,” he said.

She hesitated but only for a moment; she continued toward him as if approaching a wounded animal. 

“Don’t,” he repeated, his voice breaking. His shoulders began to tremble as she took his face in her hands.

“It’s okay,” she whispered. “I’ve got you.”

Ben fell to his knees, undone. Rey pulled him to her as he buried his face into her middle, just below her chest. His whole body shook as he sobbed against her and she gently kissed his hair as they held each other, crying.

In that moment there was nothing else. No Resistance, no First Order. Just the two of them and their grief. 

He gently pushed her from him as he looked up into her eyes. His lips parted as his jaw clenched and suddenly his lips were on hers. Rey’s knees buckled and Ben carefully lifted her, one arm encircling her waist. He placed a hand on her chest, feeling her heartbeat below his palm. Strong, steady, all the things he wished he could be. He broke the kiss, taking in the sight of her; the flush of her cheeks, the loose tresses of her hair had fallen from the carefully woven braid Connix had pinned up just moments before. 

He softly gasped as she touched her fingertips to his scar, just above his eye. She traced the line down his cheek, following its path over his jaw bone and down his neck. 

_ My doing _ , she thought. 

Her fingers continued to trace the path, over his collarbone. He caught her wrist in his hand and lightly pressed his lips to her pulse just before leaning down to kiss the skin just below her eyes. Her cheeks were still wet with tears. 

His mouth was on hers again and she felt an ache in the pit of her stomach.

“Ben.”

He was holding both of her wrists now as he took a step back, they’re gaze meeting once more. 

“This is the last time,” he said.

“I know,” she replied.

He tenderly kissed her forehead and then... he was gone. The Force bond, severed.

  
  



	2. Arsonist's Lullaby

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Knights of Ren have decided to pay Kylo a visit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I always thought it would be so sick if the remaining Knights of Ren were all girls. Come to find out artist Kate Sheridan also thought that would be rad. So the characters of the Knights of Ren are based on her designs and a comic that she drew. I loved her concepts so much I just knew I needed to write them in. You can find out all about them here: https://bit.ly/2Ipyon0 Also support her cuz she's super talented! katesheridanart.com

“Sir, we’re receiving a transmission.”

Kylo glanced to the guard to his left. How long had the guard been standing there? Did he give himself away? His red eyes, the way his shoulders hung.

“Is there a reason you’re bothering me with this?” he asked threateningly.

“It’s Tyr,” called a voice from the hallway. 

Hux sauntered into the doorway smirking. He looked quite smug as he forced the soldier out of his way, his face flushed red. 

“She and the other Knights of Ren are on their way.”

Kylo felt his stomach drop. “I’ll take the call here in my chambers,” he said and closed the door before Hux could protest.

There was a slight hum and the hologram of Tyr blinked into place on the platform. Her silver hair hung about her shoulders; the scar that curved around the outside of her right eye stood out against her tanned skin. He had almost forgotten what she looked like under her helmet. It had been a long time.

“Kylo Ren,” she mused. “You look terrible.”

“Tyr,” he replied. “I hear you’re en route. I don’t remember giving you orders to come here.”

“I don’t remember you being in a position to give me orders,” she snapped.

“Given the current circumstances--”

“Ah yes, well, Snoke never appointed you as his successor. We have an awful lot to discuss.” Her eyes squinted as the corner of her mouth turned upward into a crooked, knowing grin. “Looking forward to it.”

The hologram blinked off as she disconnected.

There was a tightness in Kylo’s chest and a sudden shock of pain running from his knuckles to his elbow. He pulled his fist away from the wall, revealing a deep crack. He had lashed out without even realizing it.

_ Never could control that temper. _

A jolt of surprise ran through him, goosebumps rippling along his arms. He quickly scanned the room to find the source of the voice... but there was no one. 

“Luke?”

No reply. 

It didn’t matter. There were more pressing issues. If Tyr and the other Knights were coming to base then that could only mean one thing: they knew the truth. They knew the truth and he was running out of time.

* * *

 

_ Every inch of his body felt like it was screaming as he pulled himself from the rubble. There was something warm running down his forehead, into his eye. He wiped it away and saw it was blood. Ben turned back to the ruin of what was once his hut. There was no sign of Luke beneath the straw and stones but he was certain; it hadn’t been a dream. His master, his uncle, really had come to kill him. Snoke was right, Skywalker truly did fear his power. _

_ Suddenly a chorus of screams split across the night air. Ben turned towards the sound and felt as if all the air had been sucked out of his lungs. The Temple was burning. The time Snoke had spoken of had come. _

_ “Come, young Solo,” Snoke’s voice echoed in his head. “Come and fulfill your destiny.” _

_ The other students were beginning to come out of their huts. Ben ignited his lightsaber. _

_ Ben and the others were gathered at the base of the steps of the blazing Temple, the heat of the flames licking his cheeks and giving the night an eerie feel of daylight. Snoke, his gnarled frame silhouetted against the flames, looked out over the destruction he and his disciples had orchestrated. He placed a firm hand on Ben’s shoulder. _

_ “Well done, my apprentice,” he murmured before addressing his followers. “My Knights, we shall shape the galaxy as we believe it to be. The Jedi are no more and the Force is ours to command.” _

_ “You’re wrong!” called a voice from across the field. _

_ Standing alone with her lightsaber in hand was a girl with silver hair and a brow so stern, she practically radiated fury. The crescent moon shaped cut around her right eye bled red tracks down her cheek and onto the collar of her training robes. Ben shook his head.  _ Sada.  _ She was headstrong during lessons and she was headstrong now. Only this time it would get her killed. _

_ Snoke chuckled. “Don’t be a fool, child. Lay down your lightsaber and pledge yourself to me... or die.” _

_ Sada glared at Ben, hatred burning in her eyes. There was a hum and flash as she activated her lightsaber; her eyes never leaving his. Ben’s jaw clenched.  _ Idiot.

_ “Take care of it,” growled Snoke.  _

_ Ben made his way down the stone steps towards her, igniting his own lightsaber as he went.  _

_ “This is pointless, Sada,” he called to her. “It’s already over.” _

_ She didn’t wait for him to take his stance. With a fierce cry she was running at him at full speed.  _

_ It all happened so quickly. Her lunge, his block. They traded blows but ultimately Sada just wasn’t quick enough. Just as she pulled back to strike again Ben spun in and, with one swift stroke, severed Sada’s arm just above her elbow. She fell onto her knees and screamed. He wasn’t sure if it was from the pain or the rage. He suddenly became aware of Snoke’s laughter. _

_ “Yes, my child. That anger is all you need. You are reborn in this moment. Now rise, Tyr Ren.”  _

_ There was the distant rumble of a ship.  _

_ “Come, my Knights. We’re leaving.” _

_ Ben shivered. How long had it been raining? Sada let out a shallow breath as she fell onto her back. Even as the rain hit her face, Ben could see she was crying.  _

_ “It’s over,” he said. “You’re coming with us.” _

_ Sada stared up at the sky. When she spoke her voice was clear and level. “If you let me live, I will kill you.” _

_ “I’m counting on it.” _

* * *

 

Kylo suddenly realized he was clenching his jaw. He hadn’t thought about that night in so long. Nowadays it seemed to be all he thought about. All because of… 

_ Rey. _

No matter. He pulled his cape over his shoulders, slipped on his gloves, and made his way to the docks. 

Hux was already there, practically vibrating with anticipation.  _ Good thing he isn’t a gambling man _ ,  _ the sucker _ , his father would have said. Quickly, he shook the thought away. The ship had finally landed. 

Tyr was the first to make her way down the ramp, followed closely by a young Twi’lek no older than seventeen. She looked around at Hux and the gathering of Storm Troopers nervously. Kylo grinned to himself. Typical Taslin, she had grown into a fierce warrior but because she was coddled by the others she always seemed like she was just moments away from a breakdown. 

Hux gave a small, sycophantic bow as Tyr approached them.

“Tyr Ren,” he greeted. “It is a pleasure to have you on board.”

Tyr looked him up and down before turning to Kylo. “Your welcoming committee needs work.”

“I’ll make a note of it,” he replied a slight mocking in his voice.

A loud, boisterous laugh came from the top of the ramp.

“Hux!” Arha bellowed.

Hux’s face fell as he made an effort to appear steadfast. Arha made her way over to him and swept him into an embrace. He let out a small yelp as he was enveloped into the Togruta’s strong, muscular arms. 

“It has been much too long!” she said giving Hux a tight squeeze. “You never call, you never write.” 

Hux’s protests were nothing but muffled pleas. 

“Arha, the boy can’t breathe,” said Voxura as she made her way down the ramp, her black robes billowing out around her. She looked as if she was floating, but then again she always looked that way. Even before the destruction of the Temple, the young Mirialan was what most would deem...off.

Arha let out another hardy laugh and released Hux. He took in a deep gasp of air, struggling to keep his facade of stoic general intact. If Kylo wasn’t so annoyed at the presence of the girls, he would have chuckled. 

“Well,” interrupted Tyr. “Shall we?”

In their youth, Snoke had used the war room as a training room. Kylo and the other Knights never knew when they would be suddenly pulled to the center of it and forced to duel. Or to torture each other using the Force. Voxura always excelled at the latter. What she lacked in combat skills, she made up for in Mind Tricks. A shudder ran down Kylo’s spine as he recalled the time she made him feel like every pore on his body was on fire.

The room had not changed. In fact, this was the first time any of them had entered it since the rebellion had started. No one made an attempt to sit. Arha leaned against the wall with her arms folded. 

“I’m sure you can imagine our shock when we heard, not only, about Master Snoke’s death but also your succession.”

Kylo watched her in silence as she calmly paced in front of him. His face gave nothing away, one would even say he looked downright bored. 

“You can also imagine,” she continued, “how surprised we were to hear that all of this: Snoke’s death, your defeat, the escape of the Rebels, was the doings of one girl. A nobody, untrained, armed with a lightsaber and your father’s junk heap of a ship somehow murdered our master and overpowered Kylo Ren, the  _ Jedi Killer? _ ”

She paused and glanced over her shoulder at him. “I think you’ll find that I am justified in saying: that just doesn’t add up.”

Kylo met her gaze. He felt his fists clench. If it weren’t for his gloves, his nails would have dug deep into his palms, drawing blood. 

Arha pushed herself away from the wall. Taslin, standing close to Voxura and trying to take up as little space as possible, rolled her shoulders back and stood up straight. 

“And surely,” Arha said, “you understand why you are no longer in command here.”

Suddenly the chamber doors opened to reveal Hux and several troopers. They entered, quickly encircling Kylo with their blasters drawn and aimed. His lightsaber ignited. Tyr followed suit as did Voxura and Taslin. Arha, who never carried a lightsaber much to Kylo’s and Snoke’s annoyance, drew a kyber-powered blaster from the holster at her hip. 

“We’re giving you the chance to give yourself up,” Taslin said almost pleadingly. 

“Either way, the will of the Dark Side will be realized,” added Voxura. 

The air in the room felt thick; it was hard to breathe. Kylo’s body began to move before he was even aware of it and everything seemed to happen with terrifying speed.

His left hand shot out, the troopers tore away from the entrance, their bodies hitting the walls and falling to the ground like rag dolls. The remaining soldiers fired their blasters. Another move of his hand and the small red streaks of light froze, seeming to trimble frozen in place. He made a fist and the blasts flew back at them, killing them instantly. Hux’s hands fumbled at his belt as he attempted to draw his own blaster but he very quickly found himself thrown into Taslin, knocking her backwards, her lightsaber flying from her hand.

Just as he began to make a move for the door, Voxura and Tyr charged. He barely had time to block both of their blows with his lightsaber, the blades crackling as all three of them connected. Tyr lashed out with a sharp kick to his right hip, sending him to his knees. Kylo gripped the hilt of his saber and gritted his teeth, pushing back against them.

There was a shot,  _ pew _ , and a white hot flash of anguish engulfed his right side. Arha had shot him. He felt a wave come over him. With a cry of rage, he sent Voxura and Tyr flying across the room and turned his focus to Arha. 

She grinned at him, her right eyebrow arched cockily as she re-aimed. Suddenly her breath caught in her throat and her lungs felt as if they were being crushed. With a flick of his wrist, Kylo lifted her off the ground. Her blaster fell to the floor with a loud  _ clang _ . Arha’s hands clamoured at the invisible vice around her neck, her frightened eyes fixed on Kylo’s. He would kill every last one of them if he had to. 

_ Pew!  _ Another shot rang out. Kylo felt as if a lit torch had been rammed straight through where his arm connected to his shoulder. He released Arha and she slumped to the ground, barely moving. He turned to see Taslin kneeling, holding Hux’s blaster. To his left Tyr and Voxura were stirring. Blood was seeping from his shoulder and side. There was no other choice: he had to run. 

The rest seemed to happen in flashes: a few troopers running toward him, all them being flung into each other; making it to the docks, climbing into a tie fighter. He wasn’t sure where he would go as he started up the engines, leaving smears of blood on the controls. The ship lifted and before they could stop him he was gone.

“Prepare the fighters for pursuit!” Hux screamed.

“Disregard that!” shouted Tyr. 

Hux glared at her but quickly averted his eyes as Arha shuffled over to them, Taslin holding her arm to keep her steady. Arha chuckled as she carefully bent down and dipped her fingers into a small puddle of blood, Kylo’s blood. The puddle became a trail, her eyes following it up to the steps that led to where the tie fighter had been docked. 

“He won’t get very far,” she mused. 

“Not alive, anyway,” added Voxura.

Tyr grinned and turned to Hux. “Don’t waste your fighters on him. They have more important business in the Anoat sector. I hear the clouds there are quite beautiful.”

She and Voxura shared a look; Arha gave Hux a wink which made him very uncomfortable.

“Besides,” Tyr added, “who could Kylo Ren possibly have left to help him?”

  
  



	3. Abraham's Daughter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey continues supporting her friends and the Resistance but the Force keeps pushing her and Kylo Ren together. Can she make a decision between her duty and her destiny?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh man, it has definitely been a while. This chapter really stumped me. Not because of anything big, really. I just kept getting tripped up on the sequence of events and how they would lead into everything else I knew I wanted to do. Hopefully now that it's figured out, I'll be able to post more frequently. If you haven't noticed yet, all the chapter titles are song titles because I'm trash. As always, thank you for reading.

Every time Rey looked out across Cloud City, she was filled with a sense of awe. The abundance of green surrounding Maz’s cantina was breathtaking and the furious seas of Ahch-To were unlike anything she’d ever seen, but this…

 _Like a dream_ , she thought.

She took in a deep breath, letting the cool air run through her when suddenly- there was a strange smell. _Blood?_

“Rey?”

Finn’s brows furrowed with concern. That was how he usually looked at her these days. Ever since Leia’s death, Rey could feel him keeping watch. They all were: him, Poe, Rose. Sometimes she even felt like BB-8 was worried about her.

“We’re about to get started,” Finn said.

She took in a small tentative breath before leaving the balcony. The smell of blood was gone.

As they entered the hallway, they were greeted by the merry chirping of BB-8. Rey couldn’t help but smile. It was hard to believe so much time had passed since their first meeting in the dunes of Jakku. She always considered the droid her first real friend and he happily rolled behind them as she and Finn made their way down the corridor.

Each side of the slender hallway was walled entirely in glass so the cityscape and clouds were visible at all times. When stationary, the view made her feel like she was floating on a soft, gentle sea made completely of foam. Now that she was moving, Rey couldn’t help but feel a little dizzy. Her legs wobbled and her stomach turned over- or was that something else? She continued walking, chin up, so as not to worry Finn any more than he already was.

The door to the council room slid open with a soft hiss revealing Poe and Rose sitting around a large table, waiting for them.

“Where’s the Mayor?” asked Finn.

“Fashionably late,” replied Rose with a slight roll of her eyes.

“No,” called a voice from outside the door. “He’s handsomely on time.”

The door softly hissed as it opened. With a flourish of pale, lavender fabric, Lando Calrissian had arrived. “And it’s Baron Administrator, by the way.”

Leia had told Rey several stories about Lando before the end. As he shook each of their hands, she could see he was everything Leia had described. He was charming and the corners of his eyes crinkled when he smiled, giving the smallest hint at his mischievousness. He finally turned to greet her but instead of shaking her hand he rested his palm against his heart before resting it on her shoulder.

“Leia spoke quite fondly of you,” he said.

“She spoke fondly of you too,” she replied.

Lando let out a small laugh. “That’s polite of you to say.”

They shared a knowing look before he addressed the others. “Now, I’m sure I don’t have to stress to you the dire circumstances we currently find ourselves in.”

He gestured for them all to sit.

“The First Order has been oddly quiet but Maz reported hearing rumors that the Knights of Ren have been on the move,” Poe said.

“Knights of Ren?” questioned Rose.

Finn crossed his arms. “Safe to assume they’re connected to Kylo Ren?”

“They must be,” Poe replied.

There was a flicker of something in the corner of Rey’s eye. She turned in time to see the edge of a black robe disappear past the door frame. Without warning, her stomach lurched and the smell of blood flooded her nose. She looked back at her companions. They seemed unphased. Didn’t they see it? How could they not smell it? There was something else too, smoke maybe? Something hot and electric for certain, like circuits overheating.

Suddenly a voice whispered, as if it was right against her ear, _Rey_.

She gasped and jumped from her chair, like ice cold water had poured down her spine. Her chair turned over behind her, she had moved so quickly. They were all looking at her now. Finn was on his feet, one hand outstretched towards her.

“Rey, what’s wrong?”

“I--” She doubled over as searing white-hot pain rippled through her right side. Someone was screaming. Was it her or someone else? The lights seemed to be flashing. There was a loud roar, like a ship was jumping to lightspeed. It was deafening, as if it was happening inside the room. She pressed her hands tight against her ears but nothing could dampen the sound. Her vision grew fuzzy. All she could make out was Lando’s outline in front of her before everything went black.

 

_Trees. Rays of light were streaming through the canopy of leaves overhead. Despite the sun, she felt so cold; she was shivering. There was something warm and wet under her hand. It took all of her energy to pull it away and hold it up to her face. She looked at her palm- was it her palm- clothed in a black glove, covered in blood. In the distance, a crescendo like thunder._

_“Rey!”_

 

She sat up with a jolt, gasping for air like she’d been holding her breath. Rose was kneeling beside her, her eyes panicked. She held her hand to Rey’s forehead.

“Are you okay?” she asked.

In the corner of the room Rey could see a hooded figure, with its head lowered. Were those Jedi robes? They looked like the ones Luke was wearing the day she first discovered him on the island, but…

“Ben?”

“Who’s Ben?” said Poe.

Lando was kneeling beside her now and Rey realized she was no longer in the council room. They had moved her to the medical bay. When did that happen? How much time had actually passed?

“What happened?” She moved to stand and a feeling like liquid lightning surged right above her right hip bone.

Lando was saying something but his voice sounded muffled and far away. Behind him should have been the white sterile wall of the medical bay but instead Rey was looking into a lush green jungle.

 _That’s impossible_ , she thought.

 _Rey…_ It was that voice again.

She knew who it was before she even turned her head. Just behind Rose she saw him. Ben was leaning against the wall, his black clothes tattered, face covered in small cuts and dirt. He was clutching his side but it wasn’t enough to stop the bleeding, it was running down his leg and pooling under his boot.

_The Knights of Ren…_

And then it was gone: the trees, the smell, the hooded figure, Ben. It was as if it had never even existed.

“What just happened?” asked Poe exasperated.

Rey threw the blankets off her legs and barreled out of the room. It wasn’t until she was halfway down the hall the she realized where she was headed: the Falcon. She rounded the corner so quickly she almost didn’t notice the gold droid coming around the other side.

“Oh!” C-3PO exclaimed in surprised. “Master Rey, Master Finn, I am so sorry.”

Finn? She looked over her shoulder to see that Finn had indeed followed her. His expression was a mix of so many things. Something made of sadness, anger, fear, and disappointment. That last one wounded Rey and she turned to completely face him.

“3PO, can you give us a moment?” His eyes never left hers.

“Of course, yes.”

3PO shuffled past them, taking one moment to glance back at them before disappearing out of sight.

“Finn--”

“How long?” he interrupted.

“What?”

“Have you been connected like that, how long?”

She sighed and lowered her gaze. “Since Ahch-To.”

Finn’s expression softened. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

A lump was forming in Rey’s throat. There was so much she had been keeping from her beloved friend. “Because at first I thought it was an illusion. Snoke said he was manipulating it but… it kept happening. First in my dreams and then when I was awake. I don’t know why but the Force it keeps pulling us together and without Luke or Leia here I can’t be sure as to why…” her voice trailed off as she wiped the tears from her eyes.

“I saw him too.”

The shock of what he said felt like someone knocking the wind out of her chest. All she could do was look at him in disbelief and confusion. Then suddenly it all clicked together, as if she had known all along.

“Finn!”

“It comes and goes,” he explained. “Like a light, it flickers. At first I didn’t know what it was. Today was the strongest it’s ever been. Ever since that day you found us on Crait.”

Rey pulled him into her arms, holding him as tight as she could. Finn, her Finn.

He gently pushed her back so he could look at her. “They’ll call you a traitor, if you go after him.”

“Will you call me a traitor?”

“I have trusted you from the first moment I met you. I don’t understand it and I don’t like it but the Force is pulling us all together and…”

“And Ben Solo might be the only hope we have.”

He gently kissed her forehead before taking a step back. “Hurry back. Something’s coming, I don’t know when but it’s soon and it’s definitely not good. And be careful.”

“I will.”

And with that, she ran to the docks.

  



	4. Bloodstream

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kylo Ren has managed to flee from the Knights of Ren, but he hasn't done it unscathed. Crash landed on an unknown jungle planet he must struggle with the memories of his past as well as his survival.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I like the idea of delving into the corruption of Ben Solo but I also don't want all of the answers. I suppose this was my way of doing that.

_“All right, everyone! Gather around.”_

_The Younglings quickly scampered over to Luke. He gave them a small smile and chuckled as a few tugged at the sleeves of his robes. Behind the gaggle of Younglings, assembled the older students, his sullen nephew amongst them. Ben always stood just a bit further from everyone to where it was noticeable. He had a habit of isolating himself from his peers. If only the Jedi texts covered something as simple as making friends._

_“We’re going to do things a little differently. The Younglings will come with me, the rest of you will be training with Master Snoke.” Luke gestured to his second in command._

_The children seemed shrink in closer to Luke as the gnarled old man stepped forward. There were many rumors as to what caused his disfigurement. All of the students were too frightened to ask, if they were being honest. All that was known was he was extremely powerful in the ways of the Force. Some of the students said he was even stronger than Luke. Ben had his doubts about that. How could anyone be stronger than the legendary Master Skywalker?_

_Snoke’s gaze met Ben’s and the boy felt a shiver ripple down his spine._

 

_He hit the ground, hard. His lungs burned as he struggled to breathe._

_“Let the pain be a lesson,” Snoke’s voice graveled. “Let it fuel you.”_

_The young girl had bested him. Ben wasn’t sure what made him more angry: that he had been beaten or that he had been beaten by her. Sada extended her hand but her eyes sparkled with a taunting expression. That clenched it._

_Ben felt the energy push from his body before he really knew what he was doing and Sada flew across the field, landing at the feet of their classmates. The use of the Force made his ears ring; or was it the guilt of lashing out at Sada setting in? The other students were shouting but he couldn’t hear them. His heart was pounding. He noticed in that moment that Snoke was watching him, the corners of his crooked mouth slightly upturned. Ben clumsily pulled himself to his feet and ran into the surrounding trees._

 

_It was dusk now. Ben quietly pulled black the flap to the entrance of his uncle’s hut and let himself in. The inside was littered with its usual small metal parts and contraptions._

_“A habit from childhood,” Luke had explained. He said he needed something to keep his hands busy. "Sometimes," he had explained,  "fixing things helps me focus far more than any Jedi meditation technique."_

_Usually when Ben entered his uncle's hut, it felt warm and welcoming. It definitely did not feel like that now._

_“Master Snoke has asked to see you,” Luke said without looking up from the training droid his was repairing._

_Ben felt his ears burn. From shame? Embarrassment, anger? Maybe all three at once. Luke still hadn’t looked up at him. He waited a moment before turning to leave. Just as he was poised to cross over the threshold his uncle spoke,_

_“You’re anger is getting in the way.”_

_Ben sighed. “Must we go over this again?”_

_He turned around to see his uncle was looking at him now. His eyes were narrowed, his brow stern. Unsurprisingly, it reminded Ben of his mother._ Skywalker trait _, he thought._

_“You tell me. I’m not sure what to do, Ben. I can teach you combat, I can teach you to harness the Force and bend it to your will. But I can't teach you self-control. I can’t teach you patience or compassion. You have so much potential and raw talent but you’ll never live up to it if you give in to every emotional impulse you have.”_

_“Never live up to your reputation, you mean.” Ben’s cheeks flushed with anger. “My failures and shortcomings are mine; they're not a reflection on you.”_

_“Everything you do is a reflection on me!” Luke snapped. “Whether you mean it to be or not. That is how your peers see it. You cannot escape the legacy you were born into.”_

_“That’s not fair!”_

_“Nothing is!”_

_There was a buzz in the air. Something close to electricity but more internal. Luke suddenly realized all of the items in his hut were hovering._

_“Report to Master Snoke. We’ll discuss this later.”_

_Ben stormed out of the hut but the items continued to float. Luke became aware that he had been clenching his fists. He took in a deep breath and slowly loosened them. As he did the furniture and small mechanical bits softly settled back into place. He could almost hear Master Yoda’s voice in his head:_

_“Much to learn you still have, Young Skywalker.”_

 

_When Ben reached the Temple, he noticed the twisted figure waiting for him on the steps._

_“Master Snoke?” he called. “Unc-- Master Skywalker said you wanted to see me.”_

_Snoke slid his long, slender hands into the folds of his sleeves. “Ah yes, young Solo. I felt it was important to discuss what happened today. Come.” He turned and, seemingly, glided into the Temple._

_Their footsteps echoed through the empty stone hall. It was one of ancient Jedi Temples left before the days of the Empire. It had managed to go undiscovered through the Rebellion. Luke said it held many secrets, some he never assumed he’d be able to find. With all the old Jedi gone it was up to the new Order to find their own way._

_The great pillars that rose to the vaulted ceiling were covered in ancient symbols as well as constellations. Equal parts star map and historical record, Ben guessed. He glanced to his teacher and realized Snoke was watching him; almost studying him like he had been when he attacked Sada, like he was a riddle._

_“I want to apologize,” said Ben attempting to break the uncomfortable silence._

_“Oh?” Snoke replied amused. “Do you believe you have something to apologize for?”_

_Ben wasn’t sure if the old man was testing him or not. “I should apologize for my behavior. During the lesson.”_

_“Only if you feel you were wrong.” Snoke paused. “Do you feel you were wrong?”_

_Ben raised his chin, almost defiantly, as he met the Master’s gaze. “No.”_

_Snoke’s face broke into a ghastly sneer of a smile. “One should never apologize for having power.”_

_They had stopped in front of one of the pillars furthest from the entrance, in the back corner. Snoke reached out and traced the path of one of the planets chiseled into the stone with a long, skeletal finger. Ben squinted. Were the symbols beginning to move? A loud clang echoed through the Temple. It sounded like a large lock clicking out of place. It was then followed by a soft hiss of stone sliding against stone._

_A deep chasm had opened in the floor at the base of the pillar, revealing a staircase. Ben stared at it, his mouth agape._

_“Follow me, Young Solo,” Snoke said as he descended the stone steps. His long robes made him look as if he was floating. Despite his unease, Ben did as he was told._

_The secret room was dark. At first it appeared as if there was nothing in it at all, save for Snoke and himself. But as Ben’s eyes adjusted, he could see there was some sort of altar in the middle of the room. There was something sitting in the middle of it and something else as well. A glow? It was small at first, like the flickering of a candle, but the longer he gazed at it the more it seemed to grow. He felt a pull in his chest. Something was calling him. He found that, without realizing it, he had already been walking toward the light. It was growing even brighter now; a fierce red glow flooding the room. In the middle of the altar appeared to be a small box. Only it wasn’t quite a box. The sides of the object steepled to sharp point and each side had jagged lines and symbols he didn’t recognize etched into it._

_Ben’s hand was trembling as he reached for it. A strange wind had started swirling around the room. Was it wind? No, no it was voices. Only he couldn’t make out what they were saying. They were scrambling over each other, all fighting to be heard. The symbols on the contraption seemed to be moving._

_“Tell me, Young Solo,” Snoke’s voice cut through the chatter. “What have you been told about your bloodline?”_

_There was a ragged breath rattling in Ben’s chest. Or at least it seemed to be coming from him. It sounded almost mechanical. As his fingertips touched the glowing symbols, he realized there was something else in the room with him. He looked up and was staring into the face of the most horrifying creature he had ever seen. It was tall and encased in armor, covered head to toe in darkness. Ben found he was completely transfixed by the large red, unblinking eyes of its helmet._

_“You,” its deep voice rumbled, causing Ben’s bones to vibrate. “You have only begun to discover your power.”_

  


* * *

 

Every part of his body was screaming. The stones, he had pulled them down on both of them without thinking--

Wait…

No, that was long ago. Wasn’t it?

Kylo Ren tried to open his eyes, it felt like it took every ounce of strength he had to do it. As his eyes refocused it all came back to him:

The Knights of Ren, fighting for his life, barely escaping.

He had managed to make the jump to lightspeed but the loss of blood had made him weak. He must have hit the controls somehow because when he came to the TIE fighter was spinning out of control as it fell into the planet's atmosphere. Just before impact everything had gone black.

“Well, at least you had the good sense to buckle up.” The voice caused Kylo to start, which he immediately regretted, the sharp pain in his side shooting into his very core.

His uncle’s ghost was right though, had he not he most definitely would have been dead. Clumsily he pawed at the restraints. There was so much blood on his gloves he couldn’t unfasten them.

“Quite the mess you’ve gotten yourself into.”

“If you’re not going to offer anything constructive then just be quiet,” Kylo snapped.

Finally he heard the buckle click. He reached out a hand just in time to catch himself before falling through the busted viewport. Sucking in a sharp breath through gritted teeth, he braced himself before finally jumping from the mangled cockpit. As his feet hit the ground, his knees knocked together and his legs gave out, sending him sprawling.

“Argh!” he growled, rolling onto his back.

Overhead was a dense canopy of green. The trees were skinny but the leaves were large. They looked like the droopy ear of some creature he could picture from childhood but couldn’t remember the name of. The sky was white with the intense glow of the sun. He was suddenly aware of the humidity. Even though his clothes were drenched in sweat he couldn’t help but shiver. His arms felt so heavy as he lifted his left hand in front of his face. The black glove looked wet and slick as it caught the gleam of the light. So much blood.

Where was he? Possibly somewhere in the Outer Rim? It wasn’t like he had a chance to punch in the most coherent of coordinates upon making his escape.

Luke sat on a fallen tree trunk to his left. Ben avoided his uncle’s spectral gaze. He would have felt more enraged at the specter’s presence if he had the strength.

“Don’t you have anything better to do than torment me in my final hours?”

“Oh, are these your final hours?” Luke replied slyly.

Ben finally looked at him. He looked just as he did during their last duel on Crait, only now he was surrounded by the ethereal glow of… he wasn’t really sure what. The Force? The afterlife?

How long had he been lying there? He took a moment to get his bearings before pushing himself into a seated position.

A cool breeze lifted his hair from his sweat soaked brow. Only--- only it felt so cool, fresh even. It didn’t make sense considering the humid air around him. It was like it was coming from a different place entirely.

_“Knights of Ren?”_

_“Safe to assume they’re related to Kylo Ren?”_

Those voices. They sounded so familiar.

“Who’s there?” Ben called out. He looked to Luke for an explanation but the old ghost merely shrugged and shook his head.

Ben looked towards the depths of the jungle. Where he expected to see a vastness of green he instead saw a sea of clouds. As the clouds began to thin he was suddenly standing in a room with furnishings decorated in the soft colors of a sunset. In the center was a large table and seated around it were vague human shapes that were slowly coming into focus.

FN 2187 was who he recognized first.

 _Traitor_ , he thought instinctively.

There was an older man there as well. The cape, the twinkle in his eye. He was familiar, at first Ben couldn’t place him but then---

“Uncle Lando,” he whispered. No one stirred. No one could hear him.

To Lando’s right sat the Resistance pilot he captured on Jakku. That seemed like a lifetime ago.

If FN 2187 and the pilot were here then this had to be some sort of strategy meeting, which meant--

His head was swimming, he had looked around the room too quickly. He almost missed her but there she was.

He felt a new rush of dizziness as he struggled to his feet. Despite how cold the rest of his body was, he felt a new surge of warmth pulsing from his side as the effort to stand caused more blood to gush from his wound.

“Rey.”

She jumped. She had heard him!

He reached for her but she was too far. There was something warm on his cheeks. His vision began to blur. Tears?

“Rey!”

She turned and when her eyes fell upon him it felt as if they were boring into him. “Ben?”

And then... nothing. She had vanished. They all had.

“Ben.” Luke’s voice was gentle, almost comforting.

Kylo shook his head, slumping against the still-intact side of the TIE fighter. “Get away from me.”

“I know you feel it. A pull---”

“To the Light?” he shot back, mockingly.

Luke grinned. “To her.”

The sun started to feel too bright. He needed to move to some sort of shelter.

“Do you plan on saving her?” Luke asked, giving him a knowing smile. “Again?”

  



	5. Highspeeds

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey searches for Ben and is surprised by who she finds instead.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm probably pushing certain things as far as Jedi mythos is concerned but whatever. This idea came to me after seeing a combination of comparison gif sets on Tumblr but I won't say more than that cuz I don't want to spoil anything. As always, thank you for reading.

Rey shuffled around the escape pod chamber, inspecting the circuits as Chewie sat in his usual position at the helm. The Wookie let out a disapproving growl that echoed down the hall.

“Yes, I know,” Rey replied without looking up.

He growled to her again, louder this time.

“Yes I know last time didn’t go as planned.”

R2-D2 stood in the entry way, beeping franticly before punctuating his final point with a long, high pitched whistle. Rey narrowed her eyes at him before returning to her task.

“I don’t need a lecture from you, too.”

She already knew her plan was madness: fly blindly relying on only her gut and hoping the Force would show her the way. Honestly she would have given herself a lecture too. Especially since everything had gone quiet. She hadn’t had a vision since the medical bay on Cloud City and she was beginning to feel uneasy the further they went. They were taking a big risk and all based on a cryptic vision.

 _The Knights of Ren…_ Was that a warning?

A memory flashed in her mind as she recalled Maz’s cantina. When she first heard the call of the lightsaber, the Force showed her an open field in the rain: Kylo standing in its center surrounded by figures in dark robes and black masks. Were they also former Jedi turned disciples of Snoke’s twisted teachings? That idea chilled her the most.

The escape pod seemed in good condition. It would certainly get her there, if she could just figure out where _there_ was.

Chewie gave her a soft welcoming crow as she walked into the cockpit and took her seat at the controls.

“Just a little further out,” she said trying to sound confident.

Carefully she reached over and opened a small compartment under the console. The cracked spines of the sacred texts she had taken from Ahch-To sat all neatly crammed together. It was the first time she’d thought about them since she moved them from her bunk to the Falcon’s cockpit. At the time she thought moving them to place she spent the most on the ship would encourage her to look them over. But once Leia passed…

Tenderly she reached out and traced a finger down one of the books, a thin little thing bound in grey material. A shiver ran up her arm, the hair standing on end. It felt as if something was pulling a string connected to her chest; pulling it ever so slightly. There was an image buzzing at the back of her mind. She closed her eyes, squeezing her eyelids tight, trying to will it forward. A shot of what felt like electricity ran through her entire body. She opened her eyes with a gasp. Chewie was looking at her even more concerned than usual.

She grinned. “I know where he is.”

As if shot from a blaster, she bolted out of the cockpit and through the bulkhead door. R2 let out a shriek as she jumped over his domed head so as not to knock him down and ran up the entry ramp back into the escape pod chamber. Her fingers felt clumsy as she began punching coordinates into keypad on the side of the escape pod. Just through the chamber’s viewport she could see a planet looming in the distance, blue and green with very little clouds in its atmosphere. That had to be it.

An inquisitive cooing came from the chamber door. Chewie leaned against the doorframe, his arms crossed over his chest.

“I can find him,” said Rey, defiantly.

The Wookie began to growl in protest but Rey held up her hand.

“No, you stay here. He’s alone and afraid. If he sees all of us he’ll do something rash and stupid. You know how he is.”

Chewbacca gave a knowing nod which made Rey smile. “I’ll signal you.”

He kneeled beside her so he could meet her gaze. Even crouched down he was still twice her size. She reached up, resting a hand on his shoulder.

“Don’t worry about me,” she assured him as she pressed a button on the side of the escape pod. The lid slid open, the hydraulics making a slight hissing noise.

A sad warble trembled in the Wookie’s throat. _I’ve got a bad feeling about this._ He reached out and ruffled her hair with a palm so large it covered the entire top of her head. With a soft chuckle, she hugged him around the middle, almost disappearing in his tufts of fur. She hopped inside the pod and the lid hissed again as it slowly closed, sealing her inside. Chewie stood by the controls and pulled a small lever to open the hatch. Just before the pod ejected Rey heard a frantic beeping. They picking up some kind of signal. Something was coming.

“Chewie!”

But it was too late. Her stomach lurched into her throat as the pod was shot into space.

As Rey hurtled toward the planet, she felt completely helpless. The Falcon was doing it’s best to avoid the three TIE fighters that had suddenly appeared. There seemed to be no other signs of the First Order.

 _They must be scouting ships,_ she thought.

The Falcon dizzyingly rolled to avoid two of the TIE’s barrage of laser-fire, swiftly returning fire as it became upright again. The third Fighter emerged from the smoke of the its companion ships, hoping to take advantage of the cover, but the Falcon was too fast. The last enemy ship burst into debris. Rey gave a little whoop of victory and felt a wave of relief but only briefly as she realized the debris was falling toward her. Like the pod, it had been captured by the planet’s gravitational pull. All she could do was close her eyes and brace for impact.

* * *

 

Chewie let out a desperate cry as he watched the remains of the third TIE fall towards the escape pod. The  His mind was flailing with every scenario of what he could have done differently. _I should’ve led it away from the escape pod and then shot it down. I should’ve jumped to lightspeed right when we spotted them. I shouldn’t have let that foolish girl go without me. I shouldn’t have let her go at all!_

But it was too late. He watched in horror as the solar panel of the Fighter slammed into the side of the escape pod, sending them toppling over each other as they disappeared into the planet’s atmosphere. He made a move to fly towards the horrific scene but before he could hit the controls there was a flash of an explosion. He shielded eyes and when he lowered his arm all he could see was smoke and space dust. Through the comlink he heard R2 let out a series of sad beeps. His old friend was right, if the First Order was looking in the Outer Rim, they had to warn the others at Cloud City.

The Wookie’s heart felt heavy as he made the jump to lightspeed.

* * *

 

_“Come back!”_

Rey woke with a start, banging her head against the lid of the pod. Her thoughts were swimming as she tried to focus her gaze. She was alive, battered and bruised, but still alive. She fumbled for the release lever, found it, and pulled. The pod lid groaned as it jerkily slid open.

A sharp pain stabbed through her skull as she sat up and became aware of the blood running warm and wet down the left side of her face. Tenderly she touched the gash just below her hairline and winced. It was a large cut but not too deep. Just enough of an injury to be irritating. Her ears were ringing, she realized as she struggled to stand and step out of the pod.

Littered around her were the remains of the TIE fighter that had crashed into her. The majority of the ship laid in a crumpled, smoking pile a few yards away. It had charred a wide jagged path through the surrounding greenery before settling in its final smoldering heap.

Beyond it was a vast stretch of vibrant green. It had to be the jungle from her vision.

 _Where to even begin?_ She thought, overwhelmed.

There was no way to know where Ben was amongst the thick smattering of trees. And with his injuries time was of the essence.

She took a step toward the jungle before stopping short, her breath catching. Despite the humidity and the blaring sun overhead, she felt her arms break out in goosebumps. Just at the edge of the treeline stood what appeared to be the hooded figure she saw on Cloud City. The cape of its ceremonial robes billowed out behind it as it turned and disappeared deeper into the trees.

Ignoring the pain in her head and legs, Rey sprinted after it.

The humidity back by the wreckage was intense enough, but as she entered the shade of the trees the air was so thick it felt like running into a wall. She could almost taste it.

Her eyes darted from shadow to shadow, worried she had already lost the apparition. She did a double take as it came back into view just up ahead. It almost seemed to be waiting for her. As she drew closer it began walking away, leading her deeper into jungle.

 

It wasn’t long until she came upon a clearing. The air was refreshingly cool, much to her relief. She took in a deep breath and felt her lungs expand and fill with the light air. In the middle of the clearing sat two stones opposite of each other. They almost resembled chairs with a vague shape of a back and two arm rests. Sitting in the one facing her was the hooded figure, its arm outstretched, gesturing for her to sit.

“Don’t be afraid,” it said, its voice oddly youthful.

Rey’s heart made a large thump against her chest. “Are you--are you real?”

“As real as anything,” it replied. She couldn’t see its face but she could hear the smile in its voice.

Hesitantly she sat down, her eyes never leaving apparition.

The figure sat quietly, unmoving for what felt like an eternity.

“Who are you?” Rey asked, breaking the silence.

“I’ve had a few names. One more known than the others.”

As the figure reached for its hood Rey noticed the gleam of something mechanical.

_His hand._

She held her breath as the figure pulled the hood back, the fabric resting about its neck and shoulders. Her head cocked to one side, confused, as she took in the sight of him. He was young, maybe only a little older than her. There was no way she knew him but she couldn’t help feeling he was oddly familiar. She’d certainly seen those eyes before; blue and playful, but also concealing a storm within. They reminded her of Luke.

“If it’s okay with you, I would like you to know me as Anakin, Anakin Skywalker.”

  



	6. Both Sides Now

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey and Ben are faced with distant memories as they navigate the depths of the jungle.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh man, so many things. Firstly, that Episode 9 teaser trailer has got me wrecked y'all. So many emotions. As excited as I am, I'm still going to write this story the way I originally intended. Secondly, I would like to give a shout out to the Star Wars Theory Youtube channel. A lot of their videos helped me in my research for these scenes. And thirdly, as always, thank you for reading.

Ben’s legs felt as if he was wading through tar, every movement taking so much more effort than he could afford. How long had he been walking? The jungle around him was growing denser and darker the further in he ventured in. He stopped for a moment to look himself over.

At some point in his fevered wandering he must have discarded his gloves and ruined tunic, because he was now stripped to the waist. He was a mess of dirt, sweat, and blood. What was left of his tunic had been torn into strips and wrapped around his middle in an attempt to cover his wound. It wasn’t enough to stop the bleeding but it would at least keep it somewhat clean. Reaching out, he braced himself against the nearest tree trunk and surveyed his surroundings.

There was no telling which way he had traveled from, the trees had seemingly swallowed his path. Using the tree for support, he attempted to lower himself to sit but he lacked the strength and feebly slid to ground. 

_ Perfect _ , he thought sarcastically. He laid in the cool dirt on his back, finding solace in the fact the air wasn’t nearly as suffocating at that level. It was the only comfort he could find.

_ I guess this is the place. _

It was hard to believe he, Kylo Ren the  _ Jedi Killer _ , was going to die in the middle of the jungle of some planet he didn’t even know the name of. Not in battle, not in a blaze of glory; not even in some sort of assassination attempt orchestrated by that worm Hux but in the dirt, alone.

As he began to close his eyes, he felt a quiver in the Force. 

“Go away, Luke,” he choked out, weakly, but there was no reply.

Straining, he lifted his head. He could make out figure walking out of the trees, small and ringed in an ethereal glow. Was he hallucinating now?

As his eyes struggled to focus, the figure kneeled beside him and gently brushed the hair from his forehead. 

Tears welled up in his eyes instantly. “Mom?”

The ghost beamed at him, resting her hand against his cheek. No, not his mother but she  _ did _ look so much like her. Her hair was soft and dark as it cascaded in waves down her shoulders and there was a familiar worry and sadness just beneath her bright eyes.

“No, my love, though she is with us in a way. We felt it was important that you and I spoke.”

Ben realized his side was no longer hurting. In fact his whole body felt light as he pulled himself into a seated position with ease. The ghost woman smiled at him and gently pressed her fingertips to the beginnings of the scar just above his eyebrow, the one Rey had given him. 

She let out a heavy sigh. “So much anger, so much fear. You two are an awful lot alike.”

“Who?” His question came out as a whisper.

“You’ll share the same fate if you continue down this path.”

His confusion was giving way to annoyance. 

“Who are you?”

A soft but stern look crossed the apparition’s brow and Ben was instantly taken aback at how much it reminded him of Luke. 

Despite her cross expression, she gently took both of his hands in hers.

“You can call me Padmé.”

With surprisingly little effort, she pulled him to his feet. She was small compared to his hulking stature, just like Leia had been when he first hit his growth spurt. 

Padmé kept hold of his hands and began leading him deeper into the jungle.

“Follow me.”

Ben was surprised to find that the trees steadily began to clear and the ground was becoming firmer under his boots. He looked down to see that the ground had changed because he was no longer standing in dirt but on the firm, solid floor of a ship.

Where there were once trees now stood the dark metal interior walls of the hulls of a Star Destroyer. It all felt very familiar, like something from long ago he had been pushing away and trying to forget. 

 

_ Ben wasn’t sure where the ship was taking them, let alone where it had come from. It was clear, however, that Master Snoke had been planning the destruction of the Temple and his rise to power for quite some time. _

_ He stood alone in the hull, unable to will himself to join the others on the bridge.  _

_ “My Knights, take rest and reflect on your victory. There will be much to discuss in due time. A new age is beginning and it will be forged by our very hands,” Snoke had said before boarding his own ship and departing into the vastness of space. _

_ Ben’s mind naturally went back to Luke. Had he survived?  _

_ He could see his uncle’s face illuminated by the glow of his lightsaber, his eyes wild with his violent intentions. Ben grimaced and shook his head. The old man got what he deserved. _

_ This was to be his life now. Ben Solo was gone, it was time to become someone new. _

_ He had started to head for the turbolift when he heard a light rustling. The Force prickled with energy as he cautiously approached a haphazardly stacked pile of crates in the back corner of the room. There was a pause and then another scurry of rustling.  _

_ Ben lightly flicked his wrist and lifted the top crate, revealing a small child curled into a ball. Her hands were pressed against her ears and her body was rigid, as if she was willing herself to become smaller. _

_ “Rey?” _

_ She looked up at him with wide, frightened eyes as he pushed the crate off to the side. Her cheeks were red and streaked with tears. _

_ “Ben!” _

_ A gamut of emotions washed over him as she wrapped her small arms around his middle. _

_ “What are you doing here?” he demanded peeling her off of him. _

_ A fresh set of tears welled up in her eyes but her voice stayed steady, “There was shouting and fire. I ran and saw the ships so I hid. Where is Master Skywalker?” _

_ He turned away from her, his teeth set on edge.  _

I should give her to Snoke _ , was his first thought.  _ Or should I kill her,  _ was the second.  _

_ It would spare her any of the cruelty this new life would surely unleash. Despite her age, she was strong-willed and he couldn’t imagine her coming around to Snoke’s teachings. In a way, there was a part of him that didn’t want to ever see her do so. Of all the other students at the Temple, Rey was the only one who saw him. To her he was just Ben; not the heir to the Skywalker legacy or the violent tempered failure his uncle made him out to be. _

_ He let out a long, deep sigh. There was no other choice. _

_ Firmly, he took hold of her wrist.  _

_ “Come on.” _

_ They quietly crept down the corridor to the escape pod chamber. _

 

The memory left Kylo shaking. Padmé was staring at him expectantly, trying to gauge his reaction. 

He felt the anger ripple in the pit of his stomach.

“What are you hoping to achieve?”

Padmé was unphased and even tilted her chin upward, like she was testing him. It was something Leia would do when he was younger; when she was giving him a moment to reexamine his tone.

“I don’t know what you mean.”

Kylo scoffed. “You’re conveniently leaving out the events before this. You know, the part where I slaughtered my peers and left my uncle to die?”

“Oh, I’m aware of that part I just didn’t feel like we needed to revisit it. You wallow in that memory often enough.”

He felt his anger well up to the surface.

“What are you trying to prove?”

“That we are all a combination of light and darkness!” Padmé exclaimed, unwavered. “To believe if one grows more powerful it extinguishes the other is foolish.”

Kylo matched her stance, equally stubborn. “This is who I am now! I can’t take any of it back, I can’t undo any of the damage that has been done.”

“No, you can’t.”

The bluntness of her words rendered him speechless, he almost thought he had misheard her.

“But you have the choice to move past it and become something new.”

She gave his hands a loving squeeze as she peered up into his face. “You’ve been running a long time, Ben. It’s time to let it all go.”

* * *

 

_ Anakin Skywalker… _

Rey turned the name over in her mind.

“Luke is your--”

“Son,” he finished.

Her stomach dropped as the pieces began to click together. She was certain her face was betraying her thoughts but Anakin’s expression remained calm, even patient.

“We’ll get there,” he explained, knowingly. “Now hold on.”

Before Rey could decipher what he meant, the scenery began to spiral around them. It was like barrelling on the  _ Falcon _ but without the security of being buckled into her pilot’s chair.  As the feeling became more intense, she lost all sense of place and speed. Everything was just movement and darkness and suddenly--

Stillness, at least for a moment. Before Rey could truly get her bearings, the air was flooded with a cacophony of screams. 

Her heart was pounding in her ears but her feet were rooted to the ground. In the distance was a glow, small and contained like a campfire. She squinted, trying to will it into focus as it was starting to grow. Or was she just getting closer?

The glow began to morph into a place; a large, circular room with wide chairs that sat close to the ground. The stone floor beneath her was polished, a yellow sphere like a sun set in its center. The ceilings were high and the walls were lined with tall windows. Outside of them Rey could see it was night and a city lay outstretched before them, the lighted windows dotting the blackness like artificial stars. 

Behind her, the door hissed as it slid open. As if signaled, several children appeared from behind the chairs and curtains. They had obviously been hiding but from what? Rey turned as she heard slow, heavy footsteps enter the room.

It was Anakin, but not as he had appeared to her in the jungle. The hood of his cloak was pulled low over his brow and the eyes beneath it appeared to be a sinister yellow; they almost seemed to glow. His energy radiated maliciously through the Force as it made the hair on the back of Rey’s neck stand on end. She found herself shrinking away from him.

A young boy stepped forward. “Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What are we going to do?”

Anakin’s expression remained unchanged as he ignited his lightsaber. The Younglings flinched but none of them moved to run as he stepped forward. 

Rey felt her breath catch in her throat. She wanted to call out to them, she wanted to protect them, but all she could do was bury her face in her hands and fall to her knees as the screaming started.

The screams crescendoed, rising to a deafening pitch and then--

Quiet.

She hesitantly lowered her hands and looked around. The darkness had returned, she was alone. A shudder ran through her as a single sob escaped her throat. 

“Why?”

“Would any explanation be good enough?” Anakin, the Anakin she had met, stood before her, his arms folded over his chest. “Would it change what happened? Would it justify anything?”

She merely shook her head.

He was kneeling beside her but she couldn’t bring herself to meet his gaze.

“I did terrible things,” he continued, “unspeakable things in my pursuit of power. All because I thought I was doing what was right; for the galaxy, for the woman I loved. But in the end, I still lost everything.”

Rey looked at him as the thought entered her mind. “Not everything.”

The darkness around them began to melt away again, taking on new shapes.

This time they found themselves in a control room with a large, circular viewport set in its back wall. Against that wall was a throne and sitting in it was a hooded creature with a dark, sickening smile. He cackled to himself as Rey became aware of the thrum and clash of lightsabers.

Two figures stood before them with lightsabers drawn: one a young man and the other a giant clad in black armor. The latter wasn’t quite human and also not quite machine but was altogether frightening as the glow of his red lightsaber reflected off the eyes of his helmet. 

“I will not fight you father,” the young boy said, a gentle smile playing at the corner of his mouth. 

Rey gasped. It was hard to believe Luke Skywalker had ever been so young, especially when she thought back to the bristled old man she had found on Ahch-To. As she looked him over, she couldn’t help smiling. He looked even more like Anakin than she had originally thought. 

_ Anakin… _

Her gaze was pulled back to Luke’s armored opponent and she felt her heart sink. He was now Darth Vader, the most fearsome Sith lord in the galaxy, fully immersed in the Dark Side of the Force. 

There was a loud cry and the two men were engaged in combat once again. The hooded figure sitting in the throne laughed as he rose and stalked down the steps. Luke had overpowered Vader, cutting off his mechanical hand at the wrist. The thin exposed wires emitted small sparks as he tried to move fingers that were no longer there.

“Now,” hissed the Emperor, “fulfill your destiny and take your father’s place at my side.”

Luke extinguished his lightsaber and turned, looking defiantly at Palpatine. 

“Never,” he said tossing his weapon aside and squaring his shoulders.

Rey felt a rush of pride come over her. This was the Luke Skywalker she had heard stories about. This was the Luke Skywalker who single-handedly faced down the First Order to save the Resistance.

“I am a Jedi, like my father before me.”

The Emperor pointed a gnarled finger at the boy, scowling. “If you will not be turned, you will be destroyed.”

There was a loud crack and a flash of light as the air in the room became abuzz with dark energy; lightning shot from Palpatine’s fingers in furious, blue bolts.

“No!” Rey cried as the lightning enveloped Luke.

Young Skywalker fell to the floor, writhing and crying out in anguish. Rey could feel the Force surging all around her: the malicious delight of the Emperor, the desperation of Luke and… there was something else. 

As Vader stood stoically at his master’s side, Rey could feel the conflict of emotions pulsing all around him. Regret, anger, sadness-- but the strongest of all was love. 

“Father,” Luke cried. “Please.”

Vader’s arms shot out, grabbing and lifting the Emperor above his head. Palpatine shrieked as the lightning engulfed him and his apprentice. Vader staggered to the ledge and hurled him over the railing, down into the depths of the ship; his cries echoing off the metal walls. A dark pulse of energy rattled through the Force as everything around them shook and then everything went still. The only sound was the ragged breathing of Darth Vader.

The light seemed to dim as Luke crawled to his father and pulled him into his arms, leaving Rey and Anakin shrouded in shadow once again.

Anakin clasped his hands behind his back and tilted his head to the side, a stark contrast to what he had been in his final moments. Rey’s mind was a flurry of opposing thoughts.

“Was I worth saving?”

It was as if he had plucked the question from her mind, even still Rey wasn’t sure how to answer it.

“Luke wasn’t the first person to try and turn me. Several had tried before him and I resisted every one of them, even destroyed them. So what was different about this moment?”

He paused and looked at her intently, as if he was making absolutely sure she was paying attention. 

“You can’t save him,” he added. “He has to want something more for himself.”

Rey felt as though a weight had been set on her shoulders. 

“You can help him,” Anakin continued. “You can even love him but ultimately the change has to come from him.”

Tenderly, he rested a hand on her shoulder. The two looked at each other for a moment before he gave her a smile.

“This is where I leave you.”

“But how do I--”

But Anakin was already gone and Rey found herself in a very familiar place.

 

The wind was still as the sun glared off the endless sea of sand. Niima Outpost stood off in the distance, gray and small compared to the surrounding landscape.

“Please,” said a small voice behind her. 

Rey held her breath as she looked over her shoulder and was struck by how tiny her younger self looked. It was hard to believe she was ever that little but, then again, when standing next to Unkar Plutt anyone looked delicate.

The Crolute stood a few feet away looking gruff, his massive arms folded over his barrel of a chest. 

Kneeling in front of little Rey was a boy with dark, shaggy hair and too serious an expression for someone his age. He held her by the shoulders as he spoke.

“This is a safer place for you.”

Tears began welling up in the little girl’s eyes and as she spoke Rey couldn’t help but recite the words with her; words that she had cried out in her sleep for years.

“Don’t go.”

“I’ll come back,” the young boy lied, “when it’s safer for you.”

He gave her shoulders a final squeeze before turning away and boarding a small pod of a ship.

Little Rey started to run after him but Unkar caught her by the arm, almost lifting her off the ground with his grip. Tears were streaming down her face as she struggled to wrench herself free. The ship’s engines roared as the thrusters engaged.

“No!”

“Quiet, girl,” Unkar growled, holding her fast.

“Ben!” The two Rey’s reached towards the ship as it disappeared into the atmosphere and made the jump to lightspeed. “Come back!”

The image of her younger self and Unkar Plutt became bleary as Rey’s eyes swam with tears. She covered her mouth in an attempt to hold back the sobs; overwhelmed by the memory she had repressed for so long. 

Overhead rolled a low groan of thunder as raindrops began pitter-pattering on the sand, slow at first and then more frenzied.

_ Rain in Jakku? _

It was so out of place she couldn’t help but give a brief confused chuckle as she turned up her face; feeling the relief of the cool drops on her skin. 

There was a soft humming in her mind, a familiar buzz of the Force. The hairs on her arms stood on end as a figure shambled out from behind the huts of Niima Outpost. 

Ben stopped short of her, his bare shoulders hunched over as he favored his injured side. For a moment she was sure he was a mirage; a residual shadow the Force had pulled forward from her memories. The energy pulsed between them, neither one of them moving toward the other. She wiped her face on her sleeve and when she raised her head she was once again in the jungle--

And so was Ben.

Wincing, he took a step towards her. A small smile touched the corners of his mouth just before he fell to his knees.

Rey dove to catch him by the shoulders and carefully laid him on the soft green jungle floor. His hand was shaking as he reached up to touch her face, like he was making sure she was real. He was struck by a memory of his father in that moment. Something he would say to Leia after either of them had been away for too long.

“You’re the best thing I’ve seen all week.”

Ben was sure she smiled just before everything went black.

  
  



End file.
